Adolescent Psychoanalysis

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Psycho-Analysts Ask—Conjunction Junction What’s Your Function?

Chapter 10

Part 3

New players, new solutions, old solutions, defensive about XXX residential treatment program, and worry about what mother thinks, which she never worried about before about something that sees trivial. And much more details about everything—friends, drugs, police, etc.

Session one day later.

“Hey” I said.

“Not everyone I know went to xxx (residential treatment)”, she laughed.

“Embarrassed about xxx (residential treatment)?” I asked.

“No. Like Trisha. We weren’t in the same grade but I would sleep over and we were the best friends.” She said.

“And she didn’t go to xxx?” I teased.

“I have people in my top 8 that didn’t go to xxx. “ She laughed

“Well so far you’ve mentioned 8 people and 7 of them were at xxx” I said.

“yeah. But not all.” She laughed.

“They call it a top 8 but you can make it a top 24. I have at top 12.” She explained.

“You told me it was a top 8” I said.”

“They call it a top 8. That’s just what they call it because you used to only be able to put 8 people on it. And then Tom, the person who created MySpace, he put it so that you could put 24. I wrote to him a lot at xxx.” She laughed.

“8 out of 24 or 12 or 500. Are you sure Mike didn’t design this by any chance?” I laughed.

“Mike, my therapist?” she said laughing. “no.”

“Sounds like Mike.” I said.

“No. You gotta be kidding. He couldn’t be ever that smart. Tom’s cool. You can ask him questions.” She said.

“How do you get to Tom?” I asked.

“You email him. It takes a while for him to get back to you. ‘cause he’s the creator of MySpace and everyone emails him.” She said.

Silence

“It’s so stupid! Oh. (silence). I hope he calls me! He’s losing me fast. Though maybe it’s the other way around. If he loves me as much as he says he does, or did, or I don’t know what you call it.” She said.

“Either he does, he doesn’t? What’s the other one?” I asked.

Silence.

“I don’t think I told you this. I got all of Ed’s crap together in my room, his pictures, his letters, his cologne, his flower thingies, all the things he gave me, and I put them in a bag and I’m going to give it to his aunt to give to him. And I’m going to put a note in there that says ‘if you don’t want your shit, then throw it away’. I threw away all of Tom’s shit because I hate thinking about him and I don’t care about him anymore. ‘I don’t really like thinking about you, but I thought I would give you the option of keeping the things or not. But then this is all shit anyway, right?’ and that’s the letter.” She said.

Sigh of frustration

“I don’t know, I don’t know man. I’m not calling him! I promised. If I don’t keep this promise, I’m gonna hurt myself so bad. I said that this weekend and what do I do? I call him. Maybe I’ll be too busy. I’m seeing some of my friends from xxx, I have the date, I have an orthodontist appointment.” She said.

“Maybe see Tricia. She does E. It’s really bad. She lives right across the street from me. Saturday, I snuck out and went to across the street to her house. She starts crying and keeps saying ‘I can’t believe you’re back, I can’t believe you’re back’. And I said I can’t believe I’m back either. So I go into her house and we’re sitting there talking. She just filled me in on all I’ve missed. Then we played the Ouija board, which was kinda creepy. “ She said.

Silence.

“How’d the Ouija board thing turn out?” I asked.

“I don’t know. It’s kinda creepy.” She said.

“Do you ask the Ouija board questions?” I asked.

“Yeah.” She answered.

“I’m going to take a shot in the dark about what kind of questions did you ask?” I asked.

“Yeah, it’s what you think. But also that I snuck out.” She said.

“Oh. Sneak out a big deal” I said.

“My mom would kill me. She doesn’t like her at all. I don’t know why. Yeah I do. Drugs and because she didn’t write me when I was at xxxxx. If I was on drugs, I wouldn’t want to write anybody there. I would write to anyone who wrote to me.” She said.

“Sounds to me you were forming a club, a xxxx veterans and newbie club, going to, have been at xxxxx, who you write to, etc..” I said.

“There is a club.” She said.

“Well, no. I have other friends. Like Jessica. She was with me on my 16th birthday when Tom broke up with me. I was sooo drunk, out of my mind, it wasn’t on my birthday, but technically it was because it was after midnight. So he broke up with me on my birthday. I was so completely gone, I was drunk. I was taking shots. Usually I can take 2 shots of Jack and I’m soo gone. I took 4. I couldn’t think, I was crying hysterically. She picked me and Wendy up and I got into the car and she said ‘are you guys drunk. You’re getting in my car, drunk? I can smell it (alcohol).’ She took us to her house. Just our luck we’re driving to Jessica’s house and check-point. Checkpoint! And she’s ‘oh shit, oh shit.’ What do we do? Stupid her and she turns around and the cops see us. And follows us. She turns into someone’s driveway. He pulls us over and says ‘what are you guys doing? Why did you turn?’ He can see me in the back crying hysterically. And Jen is like ‘we’re wanting for our friend here.’ He says ‘why, have you guys been drinking? Why is she crying?’ Jessica says, ‘it’s her birthday and her boyfriend broke up with her.’ He says ‘ you know what, I’m not going to give you a ticket. I’m going to go home and be with my family and I’m going to go to sleep and I’m going to have a good night.’ And then he got onto his bike and just left.” She said.